February 24, 2016

It’s Not About Me!

Last week I took Dixie to the vet for her annual vaccinations and a new vet was on rotation. We took the opportunity to get to know each other a bit, and as is typical, we ended up talking about our kids. His were considerably younger than mine, as in still teenagers. He was quite proud of his daughter’s achievements in cheer competition but was stressed, reasonably so, about a recent injury that had taken her out of competition for a while. I am not familiar about how the cheer thing works, but obviously you move from organization to organization as you get better and better over the years. She was at the top of her game! And after ten years of competing, this was her first injury…which might actually cost her team the top honors. It all seemed quite stressful for a fourteen year old!

When it was my turn to talk, I told him about my great niece and how she had opted out of drill team after a couple of years and went strictly with theater because there had simply been too much DRAMA in drill team!! Less drama in theater. Go figure!! She is having a blast!

I then told him about when my son had been a teenager, he had played football throughout junior and senior high school. Until the summer before his senior year when he told us that he wanted to quit football his VARSITY YEAR in order to be in theater the full year instead of just being able to be in the spring musical. I was hyperventilating! We were a football family!! His uncle had played in college and professionally. I had watched football since I was nine! I had a secret dream of being the first woman professional coach! (Has that been done and I just missed it?) But I took a deep breath and remembered that IT’S NOT ABOUT ME!! He had no plans to play ball in college, nor was he really exceptional. Just average. He had always completely enjoyed it and I enjoyed watching him. But he was done. He didn’t need this. His love was music and the arts. He wanted to be a Singing Cadet in college, not a football player! So I fully supported his decision (after accepting that I had ALREADY seen him suit up for the last time!), and he ended up getting a major role in every production during his senior year. He had a blast!! And I learned, or remembered, a very important lesson. It’s not about me!

Parents, that is a lesson that is important to learn right after you bring them home from the hospital! Perhaps before you ever leave!! It is one that you will need to embrace thousands of times throughout the lives of your children. As I am typing this, I am smiling at how my children are now experiencing this with their own. Even still, sometimes we need to be reminded.



“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11

“Train up a child in the way he should go:
and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6

“You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof,
for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.”
2 Timothy 3:14-17




February 22, 2016

Our Journey, and So It Continues

When I first began my blog and chose the name “Our Journey,” we were at the beginning of a very new place in our lives. I had just been diagnosed with an ornery type of leukemia and we had many decisions and changes before us.

Four and a half years have passed since that fateful day. Much has happened in my health, in our lives, and in the lives of those around us. I still have cancer, but it’s manageable. What I have been thinking about, and what I would like to continue to write about, is the journey that we continue on. Not only us…but all of us. Because we are ALL on a journey. God gives us today! If He showed us a video clip of the next months and years of our lives, we would probably be paralyzed by the fear of moving forward. But He gives us strength for the day and hope for tomorrow. How He knows what is best for us!

Please continue to walk with me as I journey this life as a wife, mom, grandmother, cancer survivor, Christian, mentor, friend, and cheerleader for my husband’s and kids’ endeavors. There’s a lot to cover. I am praying that God continues to grant that precious commodity...time.



Great Is Thy Faithfulness
Thomas Chisholm – 1925

Great Is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father!
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Though changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not
As Thou hast been Thou forever wilt be.

Great Is Thy faithfulness,
 Great Is Thy faithfulness,
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided

Great is Thy Faithfulness, Lord unto me!


Summer and winter, and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above,
Join with all nature in manifold witness

To Thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide,
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow

Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!





February 18, 2016

The Crazy Cycle of Life

As a mother of two, step-mom of four, and having led a youth group for eighteen years, I know a LOT of young moms! I smiled to myself today as a sweet friend confessed to her Facebook family that one daughter was propped up in her big highchair enjoying her dinner, watching a video, while she was being able to get some work done. Other moms chimed in with their admissions of how they survive in their worlds. As always, my favorite was my very own daughter’s with my very own crazies. :)

(I have been lying in bed thinking about this and wondering why this relentless insomnia continues to besiege me certain nights and not others. So writing and warm milk seemed a better remedy.)

Earlier today, I had brunch with my friend and part of our conversation covered the wonderful unique craziness of each of our grandkids. I would venture to say that they are not that unique, but rather a sampling, our beautiful sampling, of the millions of kids throughout the world. Not much different than the ones we raised a few decades ago. Not much different than the ones you are raising now. Not much different than she and I. Every generation trying to accomplish the same thing…get their kids to eat and behave.

Besides my young friends, I also have numerous friends my age and older. There are many who are taking care of their elderly parents or ailing spouses. Many are fighting their own health battles. Some are dealing with joints that just don’t want to work anymore and have to be dealt with in one way or another. We deteriorate.

I remember back when I was in my late 30’s, maybe 40, and going like a crazy woman with the youth group, my kids, work, and everything else, my dad said “You’re not going to be able to keep this pace forever!” I remember laughing and telling him, “Of course, I will!” Wow! Did I ever eat those words!!

The cycle of life comes full circle. When you’re young, you somehow have the energy you need to keep up with these crazy kids and all that life asks of us. Later on, you start slowing down a bit, wondering how the time flew by so fast. Then before you know it, your daughter has you sitting down at a table trying to get you to take a bite and behave. Hopefully, you aren’t running around her house without your pants on! But payback can be really funny.



February 15, 2016

Not Alone…Deciding What’s Next

In the whirlwind of children’s birthday celebrations, I have been continuing on medications that have produced more side effects than solutions, gone back to MDA for another follow up where there was a great deal of “does THIS hurt?” and finally it was decided that it is not my joints screaming pain at me but rather my tendons. Ahhh! My tendons. Well, there you go. That make’s it loads easier!! :/ The doctor then stated, “No wonder nothing that’s been tried has been working!” Comforting!

He then decided that we would move forward with injections and that I would need to wean myself off the medication that has caused more harm than good. What was my name again??

I don’t know why I didn’t ask more questions while I was there. I am usually quite detailed that way. But lately, I have just been floating through life mentally and hobbling physically. My lower back, hips, and knees just don’t want to perform anymore…at least not without a considerable amount of pain. I have been doing water therapy/exercise since last summer. You’d think that if it were going to help it would have started by now. But I know it’s good for me, so I keep on going…even though the “old” ladies are often the ones who have to help ME get out of the pool! :/

After my appointment last week, Paul and I started trying to do some research regarding tendonitis, bursitis, etc. It mostly seemed to be related to overuse and sport injuries. That did not fit. After continued Googling, we found an article that sounded as if I had written it! It was posed as a question from a lady with cancer who had pain in several of her joints…hips, lower back, knees…. They had run every blood test, done every X-ray, MRI, CAT-scan, etc. (just like me). Nothing seemed to be wrong! They had tried a variety of medications. Nothing helped. She sounded desperate. SHE WANTED TO KNOW IF ANYONE ELSE HAD EXPERIENCED ANYTHING LIKE THIS???

YES!!!!! Oh, my word! We begin to feel like we are LOSING OUR MINDS! They throw words like “immunodisregulation” at us because I don’t think they really know what’s wrong. Chemo just screws us up…some of us more than others. But to hear that there are others out there actually going through the SAME THING is immensely encouraging, even if the doctors don’t know what or why it is.

So, tomorrow we’re going to give steroid injections into my tendons a try. OUCH! The doctor tried to explain that my joints were actually moving well but the surrounding supporters were what had given out. And tendons do not have blood flow, so they do not heal like the rest of your body. Healthy people can just rest for a couple weeks, do some rehab, and whalah! Mine has had eleven months and it just continues to get worse. He’s pretty sure that it is all damage from chemo. And since I am NOT “healthy people,” rest and rehab have not helped at all. So he is hoping that the steroids will provide 1) some relief and 2) jump start some healing. Here’s hoping!

I need it to work. I have another child’s birthday coming up!