2016, March 28 – My Baby Girl

This morning, I am packing my bag and heading up to the Dallas area to spend a couple days with my baby girl. She’s turning 31. And she has three babies of her own. When did we get here?

Wasn’t I just 31? Wasn’t I just 13 for that matter?! How quickly the years go by! I remember my mother telling me when my children were little to cherish the time because it goes by so fast. But DAYS can be long as a young mom, and you don’t realize that those days turn into years until you blink and they’re in school; and then you blink again and they’re graduated, married, with kids of their own!


My girl was often the one to give me a little lip in the old days. But she is now the one who talks to me the most…multiple times a day, who knows the heart of my every tone, who makes a game of helping me find the words that now so often escape me. We talk about recipes, raising kids, doing life. She makes me laugh. I give her perspective.

She has the strength of the women of our family. The girl is amazing. She juggles being a mommy to three busy, adorable, loving, crazy children, and babysits her cousin’s one-year old. That makes four! Plus, she runs two businesses out of her home in addition to simply taking care of EVERYTHING. She has an internet business called, It Works!


And she has a fast growing bakery business, making beautiful and delicious homemade cakes and cookies for just about any occasion, called The Purple Kitchen. She reminds me of the Proverbs 31 woman using her gifts to provide for her family; her lamp does not go out at night, and she is never idle.

“Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all.”
Proverbs 31:29

I am thankful for my baby girl. I am looking forward to a couple days of dishes, cooking, laundry, constant noise, books, songs, and loving on her and her family. We’re going to have a Girls’ Night Out on her birthday! Make a few more memories. Have a few more conversations. Laugh a lot. Maybe even shed a tear. That’s ok. That’s life. That’s living. That’s part of knowing.

Happy Birthday, baby. I love you!


“Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”
Deuteronomy 4:9

Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes

Two and a half glorious weeks. Then, the steroid injections wore off. :/

It’s been just over a year now since the joint pain began. It started popping up in my Facebook feed in Remember Last Year? Yes, I remember…thank you. It started, again, just after my CAR T-Cell trial. (I also had it after my SCT, but it had eventually gotten better.) Dr. Shah, at the time, thought it was a good news/bad news thing. That my T-cells were in there fighting the bad guys but in doing so causing inflammation in my joints. Well, that was a good story last year, but those T-cells are long gone and that story no longer holds up. So what now?

Good question. Over the last several months, doctors from many departments have run countless tests only to come up with the brilliant conclusion that “nothing appears to be wrong.” Really?! Then why can’t I walk for any length of time or climb stairs or bend and get up by myself or pick up my grandbabies?!?!!! It’s not like I’m old, and my cancer is in a manageable place. So what’s the answer?

“Chemo did it.” Well, one doctor says yes while another says no. Research tells me that it’s a distinct possibility. Is it reversible? I don’t think so. I spoke to someone just today whose friend had a double knee replacement because of chemo.

But there doesn’t seem to be any knee damage per se. And meds for inflammation didn’t help. Everyone seems to be stumped. The steroid injections helped wonderfully. They just didn’t last.

This has been almost harder to deal with than the cancer itself. We’ve gotten through the life and death aspect of my cancer…twice. We still live with it being constantly on the back burner, so to speak. We have learned how to live with my “new normal.” We are thankful for every single day!

But losing my mobility has been hard. As much as I’ve always been a mover and a shaker, it now hurts to do either of those! What pains me the most is two-fold…not being able to lift and carry my grandchildren and not being able to hike our property and all the other beautiful places we love to go. You learn to improvise, but it’s just not the same.

Over the last few years on our anniversaries, we have gone zip-lining twice, hiking in the Hill Country three times including climbing Enchanted Rock, going to Pedernales Falls, Hamilton Pool, Westcave Preserve, and countless wineries and antique shops dotted along the way. There’s more, but those are the highlights. The point is, we enjoy the outdoors and all it offers. Unfortunately, knees are a necessary component to climbing and hiking. I know that other folks who have these issues figure it out. I am just praying that my team and I can figure out a plan for mine.

May and another anniversary is just around the corner. I’m praying and planning for our next hike.

Your Child’s Journey

It is an amazing blessing to watch your children’s talents and interests blossom and grow right before your eyes. It doesn’t matter if they’re three, thirteen, or thirty-three.

My son, Josh, has penned a trilogy entitled Camelot Fallen…Rise, Reign, and Fall (due out by the end of the year). (The first two are already available on Amazon.com.) It is based on the author’s interpretation of the life of King Arthur. The telling of a good story is when it plays like a movie in your mind’s eye. The cinematic imagery Josh paints throughout the series is captivating. The story, compelling.

The author, this man, was a little boy…just yesterday. He loved books. All kinds of books. As a toddler, he would sit in his little rocker listening to cassette tapes of his grandfather reading stories to him…for hours.

We watch our little ones choose this over that as they grow. We guide. But we don’t push. They each have a path, and we have the privilege as parents to equip them for the journey. Their journey.

Enjoy the journey.

“Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Bone Marrow Biopsies…or Biopsy vs Aspiration?

Yesterday, I underwent my 30th bone marrow aspiration and biopsy. I always get both. Well, 29 out of 30 times I’ve had both. Only once did I have just an aspiration. I have wondered all this time why some patients only get the aspiration while others get the aspiration AND the more in depth biopsy. So while I was waiting yesterday, I decided to do some research. So hang on. This one might get deep!

According to www.mayoclinic.org, “A bone marrow biopsy (BMB) and a bone marrow aspiration (BMA) offer different, but complimentary, information about your bone marrow cells. The two procedures are usually performed together.”

Aspirations are a sampling of the liquid portion of the marrow and are primarily utilized for cytologic assessment, cell count, cytogenetics, molecular studies, microbiologic cultures, immunochemistry and flow cytometry. The doctor/technician makes a small incision and inserts a hollow needle through the bone into the marrow. There is brief sharp pain or stinging. Several samples may be taken. The aspirate is the sample of choice for studying and classifying the nucleated blood cells of the bone marrow (eg. ratio of white to red blood cells).

Biopsies, on the other hand, allow evaluation of the marrow’s overall cellularity, detection of focal lesions, and determination of the extent of infiltration by various pathologic entities…by removing a small piece of intact solid bone marrow tissue (0.75 x 0.06 in or 2 x 0.16 cm). The bone marrow is where blood cells are made. The doctor/technician uses a larger needle to withdraw a sample of solid bone marrow tissue. The biopsy needle is specifically designed to collect a core (cylindrical) of bone marrow. There is an strong aching, tugging sensation. The biopsy of bone marrow shows the intact tissue, so that the structure of the fat cells, lymphocytes, plasma cells, fibrous connective tissue cells, and their relationships to each other, can be seen.

Most people are only given a local anesthetic to numb the site and reduce the pain. It is still a procedure, much like childbirth, where slow deep breathing proves very beneficial. For a small percentage, complete sedation may be required. In either case, the BMB or BMA is usually performed in the hipbone (posterior iliac crest). Notes are kept as to which side, right or left, was used and the alternate side will be utilized during the next exam. Scar tissue can build up which increases difficulty and pain during the procedure.

Pressure is applied to stop the bleeding and secure bandaging is required to be left on and dry for forty-eight hours. Test results usually take up to two weeks.

Now, for the reason why some get one and others get both…. Patients with Myelomas, CLL, and Lymphomas need to have BOTH the BMA and the BMB. Patients with other cancers and issues can get their answers met with just the BMA.

I don’t know about you, but I have been wondering about that for quite a while. And now we know…and knowing’s half the battle!

You’re welcome! ☺