Yesterday, my mom and I were talking on our way to her infusion appointment about the need to move forward with selling her house and all that entails. In the middle of the conversation, she said that she doesn’t want to cause a problem in my and Paul’s marriage. I almost laughed as I reached over and took her hand. “Mom, your being at this stage in life is the least difficult thing we have endured during the past twelve years!”
We have walked through years of cancer, countless trips to the ER, six different treatments, near death, numerous surgeries for us both, PT’s, loss of employment, income, insurance, vehicle, changes in church homes, difficulties with kids, extensive time apart from kids and grands due to my immune system and then distance and then Covid…and through all of it, we have become stronger, more connected, more dependent on one another and on God. We are better…and we are better together. While trials often drive others apart, they draw us together.
So even though there are days when I all I get done are things for mom, I know that these days are numbered. When I get impatient, I have a partner who is patient in that moment. When I get frazzled, I have a partner who is calm. And it goes both ways. We balance each other. And isn’t that what marriage is all about? In Ecclesiastes 4 it talks about two being better than one because they can help each other…and if one falls, the other can reach out and help. There are so many verses about living in harmony, being of one mind, and loving each other sacrificially…there is power in a pair.
“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another...forgiving one another…. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”
Colossian 3:12-14
