Just Wait!

I spoke to Mary, my PA, this morning. Dr. Shah and Dr. Weirda conferred and decided that since my other counts are still holding strong, they would continue to “watch and wait” until my next set of labs at the end of September. :/

I looked back over past blog posts to other times of “waiting!” It seems to be one of the more frustrating aspects of this journey. It’s like sitting at a traffic light that takes forever to change from red to green. Not that I am eager to rush into whatever treatment program might be next, but the on-going lack of clarity and perhaps fear of the unknown weighs heavy.

It does seem wise, and Mary agreed, that I go ahead and get my knee surgeries done while my counts are still good. I am hoping that my orthopedist will do them both at the same time and allow me to just go through the hard work of rehab and recuperation all at once. If we spread them out too far, I may not be fortunate enough to have strong counts when he’s ready to do the second one. So let’s get to it while the gettin’s good!

In the meanwhile, I am going to the gym three times a week to do water exercise and ride the recumbent bike. I am getting better on the bike every day. I still have a difficult time walking and my knees hurt and swell with overuse, or hardly any use at all. But I imagine that there are quite a few of you who have similar issues. So we press on.

It is discouraging to think that my CLL has tripled over the last six months, but in the big scheme of things it is still small compared to what it could be and to what it was before. I am thankful that the negative markers have not reappeared so far. That’s huge! So it is important that I keep my focus on the positives. And I am positive of one thing. God has got this. Always has. Always will.


“I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the LORD in the land of
the living! Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the LORD!”
Psalms 27:13-14

“but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”
Isaiah 40:31

“The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him.”
Lamentations 3:25

“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”
Romans 12:12

“I waited patiently for the Lord; and He inclined unto me, and heard my cry.
He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set
my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And He hath put a new song
in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear,
and shall trust in the Lord.”
Psalm 40:1-3

“But as for me, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation;
my God will hear me.”
Micah 7:7

“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him.”
Psalm 62:5